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Frequently Asked Questions

The legal information on this page is designed to help you learn about the laws that apply when you want to end your marriage in Washington (known as a "marital dissolution" or "dissolution of marriage"). It will give you an overview of the law and help you decide what type of case you need to file in court. This page is intended for persons who want to file a dissolution of marriage (petitioner) or persons who have been served with dissolution of marriage papers (respondent) and have questions concerning procedure.

If at all possible, you should meet with an attorney who specializes in family law before you file anything in court. If either you or your spouse has a lot of money or property, or you have been married a long time, or your spouse is going to disagree with any part of what you are requesting, you should talk with an attorney. Even if you cannot afford to hire an attorney to file your case, you should talk at least once with an attorney to get advice about your situation. 

Section 1.  Divorce or Separation?
     1. What is a Marital Dissolution?
     2. What relief may I get in a Marital Dissolution?
     3. How is a Marital Dissolution different from a Legal Separation?
     4. May I get an Annulment instead of a Divorce?

Section 2.  Where to file for my Divorce
     1. May I file a Marital Dissolution in Washington?
     2. What if one spouse has never lived in Washington?
     3. What if I cannot find my spouse?
     4. What if my spouse is a Native American who lives on an Indian reservation?
     5. What should I do if I have been served with a Dissolution and I don't think my case should be in Washington?
     6. In which county should my Dissolution be filed?
     7. What if the children have not always lived in Washington?

Section 3.  Length of a Divorce proceding
     1. How long will a Divorce take?

Section 4.  I was served with Divorce papers. The next steps.
     1. What should I do if I'm served with Divorce papers?

Section 5:  Court Orders
     1. What if I need a court order sooner than 90 days?
     2. What is a Temporary Order?
     3. Do I need a Temporary Order?
     4. Do I need an Emergency Order?
     5. What if I want to change my Temporary Order?
     6. What if your Spouse has hurt you or the children?
     7. What is a Guardian Ad Litem and a Parenting Evaluator?

Section 6:  Court decisions on property and debts
     1. How does the court decide who gets what?
     2. When we divorce, will the court divide all of our property and debts 50/50?
     3. How does the court decide what is a just and equitable division of property and debts?
     4. What if I have a Prenuptial Contract or Community Property Agreement?
     5. I bought our car and most other property with my income, so shouldn't the court award it to me?
     6. My spouse owned our house before our marriage, but we both paid the mortgage. Don't I get part of it?
     7. I think we need to sell our house, but my spouse disagrees. Can the court order us to sell the house?
     8. Is it true that I have no right to my husband's pension because he earned it?
     9. My spouse had an affair — the Divorce is my spouse's fault. Shouldn't I get more of the property?
   10. Since I'm not working right now, will the court order my spouse to pay me alimony?
   11. Important information about Marital Debts

Section 7:  Child Custody
     1. Who will get custody of our children?
     2. Who needs a Parenting Plan?
     3. How does the Parenting Plan affect my rights to see my children?
     4. How will the court decide who the children should live with?
     5. How will the court limit a parent's residential time if the court finds a Limiting Factor under the RCW?
     6. If none of the RCW Limiting Factors applies, how will the court decide who the children will live with?
     7. I want to have equal time with the children. Will the court order this?
     8. How will the court decide who should make important decisions about the children?
     9. What is Alternative Dispute Resolution and what does it have to do with the Parenting Plan?
   10. What if I want to move to a different state with the children?
   11. What if the wife is pregnant? May we still get a divorce?

Section 8:  Spousal Child Support
     1. What is Child Support?
     2. How is the Child Support amount established?

What is a Marital Dissolution?

A marital dissolution is another word for divorce — it is a court action that you may file to end your marriage. In Washington, we use the word marital dissolution instead of "divorce." You may file a marital dissolution only if you are married. In most situations, if you are legally married according to the laws of the state or country in which you were married, your marriage will be recognized as legal in Washington. Washington has "no fault" dissolution — you do not need to prove that either spouse was "at fault" in order to get a divorce. Only one party needs to prove that there are irreconcilable differences (you can no longer get along with each other).

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What relief may I get in a Marital Dissolution?

The main purpose of a marital dissolution is to legally end your marriage. In general, as part of a marital dissolution, the court may also divide your property and debts, award maintenance (also known as alimony) to one spouse, enter orders restricting one spouse's contact with the other spouse or the children, change the name(s) of the parties, and, if you have children, enter a parenting plan and order child support for the children.

However, there are some situations in which the court has the power to end your marriage, but cannot grant other relief that you might want. Whether the court will give you the relief that you want depends upon whether the court has jurisdiction over the responding spouse, and whether the court has jurisdiction over your children. If Washington does not have jurisdiction over your spouse, or it does not have jurisdiction over your children, you may still file a marital dissolution in Washington. However, there will be limits on what the court has the power to order in the dissolution.

How is a Marital Dissolution different from a Legal Separation?

In a legal separation, the court may grant all of the relief that is available in a marital dissolution but the court does not actually end the marriage. In other words, the couple is not divorced at the end. Sometimes persons will choose to file for a legal separation instead of a divorce because they do not want to end the marriage, but they want the other relief (such as a parenting plan, or property and debt division) that is available through a formal legal separation. This may be the case, for example, where a person's religious beliefs discourage him from filing for dissolution. The procedures to file a petition for legal separation are very similar and require use of the same forms. 

There are a few important facts about legal separation that you should keep in mind if you are thinking about filing one:

• You do not need to file a petition for legal separation before filing for marital dissolution.
• If you want to make sure that you are not responsible for debts your spouse may create after one of you moves out of the house, you should file a marital dissolution and a motion for temporary orders. 
• If you file a petition for legal separation, but your spouse files a counter–petition asking for a marital dissolution, the court will probably enter a marital dissolution. This is because only one spouse must show that there are irreconcilable differences between the spouses in order to get a dissolution.
• If you file a legal separation, but you later change your mind and want a marital dissolution, you will need to file and serve a new petition for dissolution (unless your spouse has cross–petitioned for a dissolution).

If the court enters a legal separation decree, the legal separation can be easily changed to a marital dissolution. Keep in mind that, once the court enters a decree of legal separation, your spouse can turn it into a divorce without your consent. Any time after six months have passed after entry of the decree of legal separation, either spouse may file a motion with the court to change the decree of legal separation to a decree of dissolution. The court must grant the request. All of the other parts of your legal separation orders (such as the parenting plan and order of child support) will not be affected and will stay in effect.

May I get an Annulment instead of a Divorce?

There is no legal action called an "annulment" in Washington. There is a little–used action called a petition for a declaration of invalidity, which is like an annulment in that it declares that the marriage was void (could not legally exist) from the day it started. There are very limited circumstances in which you can have your marriage declared invalid. The court can declare a marriage invalid if it decides that the parties should never have been married because:

• one or both parties were underage (under 17);
• lack of required parental or court approval for persons under age 18;
• one or both parties was already married when the marriage took place;
• the parties are too closely related by blood;
• one spouse lacked capacity to consent to the marriage (could not give consent), either because of mental incapacity or because of the influence of alcohol or drugs;
• a party was induced to enter into the marriage by force or duress, or by fraud involving the essentials of marriage. 

Even if the court finds one of the six factors, the court will declare the marriage valid unless the petitioner also proves that the parties have not "ratified" their marriage (showed that they wanted to continue the marriage) by:

• voluntarily continuing to live together as husband and wife after turning 18, or
• after having the ability to consent, or
• after the force or duress stopped or the fraud was discovered. 

In addition, only the spouse who was the victim of force or fraud may petition for a declaration of invalidity. If you would like to file a petition for a declaration of invalidity, or you have been served with such a petition, you should talk with an attorney.

May I file a Marital Dissolution in Washington?

You may be surprised to learn that you and your spouse do not both have to live in Washington in order for you to be able to file for marital dissolution in Washington.

You may file a marital dissolution in Washington IF:

• You live in Washington; OR
• Your spouse lives in Washington; OR
• You are a member of the armed forces stationed in Washington; OR
• Your spouse is a member of the armed forces stationed in Washington AND
• Your spouse will continue to be stationed in Washington for at least ninety (90) days following the date that you file and serve the marital dissolution.

What if one spouse has never lived in Washington?

In order for the Washington court to make certain types of orders, Washington must have personal jurisdiction over the responding spouse (the one who did not file the dissolution). Washington generally will have jurisdiction over the respondent if:

• The respondent lives in Washington;
• The respondent lived in Washington at some point during your marriage;
• One of your children was conceived in Washington;
• You (the petitioner) have continued to live, or be stationed in the armed forces, in Washington.

If you are the responding spouse and you have never lived in Washington, Washington will not have personal jurisdiction over you unless you do something to give Washington jurisdiction over you. If Washington does not have personal jurisdiction over the responding spouse, the Washington court cannot order that spouse to pay maintenance or child support or any debts, or divide any property that is not physically in Washington. 

However, the petitioning spouse may still be able to obtain a divorce even if custody and property issues will not be heard because of lack of personal jurisdiction over the responding spouse. And, if Washington has jurisdiction over your children, the court can enter a parenting plan even if Washington does not have personal jurisdiction over your spouse.

If you believe that Washington does not have jurisdiction over you, you must make that claim in writing to the court before you file anything else (such as a response) with the court in Washington. If you do not challenge jurisdiction right away, you can waive (give up) your right to say that Washington does not have jurisdiction over you. You may agree to Washington having jurisdiction over you if you would like to do so.

What if I cannot find my spouse?

If you are not able to locate your spouse, you may still be able to file a marital dissolution and serve your spouse by publication. If you serve your spouse by publication, you may ask the court to end your marriage, divide any property and debts that are located in Washington and, if Washington has jurisdiction over your children, enter a parenting plan. You should think carefully before relying on service by publication, however. 

First, if you serve your spouse by publication, you must follow the rules for service very carefully — if you do not, your court orders could be set aside years later. Second, service by publication does not give the court personal jurisdiction over your spouse unless you can prove that your spouse is hiding either inside or outside Washington in order to avoid being served or to avoid paying debts. If the court does not have personal jurisdiction over your spouse, you will not be able to ask the court to set child support, order maintenance, or enter restraining orders.

What if my spouse is a Native American who lives on an Indian reservation?

If your spouse is a Native American who is living on reservation land (even if it is not your spouse's tribe of origin), you may be required to file your dissolution in tribal court. You should consult an attorney who has expertise in Indian law to find out where you should file.

What should I do if I have been served with a Dissolution and I don't think my case should be in Washington?

If you think that the Washington court should not have jurisdiction over you, over the children, over the property, and/or over the marriage, you must argue about jurisdiction BEFORE you file anything else in the case. You should see an attorney for advice if you can. If you cannot afford one, you must be very careful not to do anything that could give Washington jurisdiction over you, such as filing a response, signing agreed orders, or asking the court to grant relief to you (other than dismissing the case).

If you do not tell the court that you do not think Washington has personal jurisdiction over you right at the beginning, you are likely to lose your chance to object. Although you may object to jurisdiction over your children at any time, it is best to do it early in the case.

If possible, you should write to the court before you have a hearing and tell the court why you believe that Washington does not have jurisdiction over you. You may also file a motion to dismiss for lack of jurisdiction. For more information on filing a motion to dismiss for lack of jurisdiction, talk with an attorney or see your Family Law Facilitator.

If you already have a hearing scheduled, and you cannot write to the court before the hearing, go to the hearing in person (or you may be able to participate in the hearing by telephone by calling the court and arranging it in advance). Tell the judge why you think there is no jurisdiction over your case. If the judge decides in your favor, then the case should be dismissed to the extent that the Washington court has no jurisdiction over the case. If the judge does not rule in your favor, then you will need to be prepared to respond to the marital dissolution in Washington.

If you are going to a hearing to tell the judge that you do not think Washington has jurisdiction, you should still prepare a response to the motion or petition before the hearing.  Do not file the response, but bring it with you to the hearing. If the judge decides that Washington has jurisdiction, you should then ask the judge to read your response.

In which county should my Dissolution be filed?

You may file a petition for dissolution of marriage in the county where you live, or in the county where the respondent lives. If the case is filed in the county where one spouse lives, and the other spouse wants to move the case to the county where he/she lives, the court may (but is not required to) change venue.

A Note on Filing in a County Where Neither Spouse Lives:
Some private services that prepare marital dissolution papers for a fee advise people to file their dissolution in a county in which neither person lives. One county in which dissolutions are commonly filed by non–residents is Lincoln County. 

However, you should think very carefully before filing in a county where neither you nor your spouse lives. If one spouse files a dissolution in a county where neither spouse lives, the responding spouse has the legal right to move the case to the proper county and the court should grant a change of venue. Thus, it can just mean more paperwork and responding to motions for you.

Further, there are practical problems with filing in a county where you do not live.  If you need to make a motion in your case, or you end up having a trial, or you need to get copies of your court papers later, you may have difficulty doing this if you have filed in a county that is far from where you live. If you want to modify the final court order at a later time, it will be much more difficult.

Finally, if your spouse does not file a response to your petition, you may have difficulty getting a default order against your spouse. If you do get a default order, you may be ordered to pay your spouse's attorney's fees and costs if your spouse asks the court to vacate (cancel) the order later. It is recommended that you file your dissolution in the county where you live, or the county where your spouse lives. If you cannot afford the dissolution filing fee in your county, you may make a motion to the court to ask that the fee be waived.

What if the children have not always lived in Washington?

Before you file for dissolution in Washington, you should find out whether Washington has jurisdiction over your children. If Washington does not have jurisdiction over your children, you may not ask for a parenting plan or custody order in Washington. You may need to file a divorce in another state.

If your children have always lived in Washington and no other state has entered a custody order regarding your children, then Washington has jurisdiction over your children. 

If your children have not always lived in Washington, you should make sure that Washington has jurisdiction over them before you file a dissolution petition if you want to have custody issues resolved in Washington. The following are some basic guidelines that may help you decide if Washington has jurisdiction over your children: 

• If you already have a court order about custody of the children, and one of the parties to that case or the children still live in the state that entered the court order, that state will continue to have jurisdiction over the children and you will need to file a custody action there (this is called continuing jurisdiction).
• If another state has continuing jurisdiction over your children, you may still file a dissolution in Washington, but Washington will not be able to grant you a parenting plan or custody order. 
• If Washington has continuing jurisdiction over your children, you may get a parenting plan in Washington.
• If no court has ever entered an order about custody of your children, Washington has jurisdiction over your children if:

            a. Your children have lived in Washington with a parent or a person acting as a parent for at least six
                consecutive months (six months in a row) before your marital dissolution is filed — Washington is
                your child's home state;
                   OR
            b. Your child is less than six months old and has lived in Washington with a parent or a person acting
                as a parent since birth at the time your marital dissolution is filed — Washington is your child's
                home state.
                   OR
            c. Washington was your child's home state (either a. or b. were true) within six months before your
                marital dissolution is filed and one parent or person acting as a parent has continued to live in
                Washington since the child left the state.

However, jurisdiction is complicated. If you have questions about whether Washington has jurisdiction over your children, you should talk with an attorney.

If Washington does not have continuing jurisdiction or home state jurisdiction over your children, you may still be able to obtain a parenting plan or custody order in Washington.  However, you will either need to show that there is an emergency (see below) or that no other state is the children's home state (meets the requirements of a., b., or c. above).

If another state is your children's home state, or was your children's home state within the last six months, then Washington probably will not have jurisdiction over your children until they have lived in Washington for six consecutive months.

Emergency jurisdiction: 
In certain limited cases in which an emergency exists that requires a court to enter orders to protect your children from abuse, Washington may be able to take emergency jurisdiction over the children. However, emergency jurisdiction usually is temporary, and Washington's orders typically will last only until someone files a legal case in the state that is the children's home state, or the home state declines. Your children must actually be in the state of Washington at the time you file your petition for Washington to take emergency jurisdiction.

Again, jurisdiction is very complicated.  If you have any questions about whether Washington has jurisdiction over your children, you should talk with an attorney as soon as possible.

This Is Information, Not Legal Advice 
We are providing this information as a public service. We try to make it accurate as of the current date. Sometimes the laws change. We cannot promise that this information is always up–to–date and correct. Most of the information provided on this web site is specific to Washington State law.

We do not intend this information to be legal advice. By providing this information, we are not acting as your lawyer. If you need legal advice, you should contact a lawyer through your local legal aid organization. Always talk to a competent lawyer, if you can, before taking legal action.

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